the eugene bean

I have 11 students, all suffering from some form of emotional disturbance, and all victims of some form of abuse. A couple have developmental disorders, a couple have behavior disorders, most of them have attachment disorders. They respond to their trauma either by becoming older then their years or ridiculously immature. It's an interesting mix. They aren't alowed to wear shoes inside for fear that they will run. I have to keep the scissors at my desk so they aren't used as weapons. I hear screaming from outside my room throughout the day.

The youngest kids seem to be the most disturbed. They don't have the slightest clue how to make sense of this scary world, and they respond like frightened animals. One of the youngest speaks only in the third person. "Mary like to play with Corrie's ball?" "Mary has a pretty shirt, does Corrie like Mary's pretty shirt?" I'm impressed that she speaks to me at all, for the first 4 weeks she hid behind her hair and grunted. Interesting.

My students are older, and all have been in the program for a while. They know what is expected of them, they know the rules, they know that the staff loves them so they are able to trust a bit more. I'm able to focus more on academics and social skills rather then just trying to keep them inside the classroom. Still, they have a hard time with self control and boundaries.

The program is truly incredible. It's based on the family, the purpose is to surround the children, who've had NO emotional stability, with family love. The kids live in a huge, comfy house. They have chores, they care for the horses and lamas, they contribute to the cooking. They are surrounded by young, positive and energetic staff who take on the roll of big brothers and sisters. The kids learn appropriate ways to communicate and to touch from the staff. I'm just amazed everyday by the amount of love and care shown to these kids. EVERYONE is patient and loving, there are no exceptions at all. Everyone is focused on what the individual children need, it's wonderful.

I'm proud to be a part of it.