the eugene bean

I had my first shift last night as a Treatment Team member at JM. I worked the PM shift, from 2 till 10, and I enjoyed every minute of it. I’ll tell you a bit about the residential program and then I’ll tell you a little about my night. What I say here won’t even begin to scratch the surface of this complex program!

There are 21 kids who live at JM. They have a 4 story residence that they call the Castle, decorated with turrets and flags and the whole nine yards. The kids live there all the time unless they are on a structured visit with family. Most of the kids who live there were given away because of their unmanageable behaviors that are the result of years of past abuse. The kids range in age from 4 to 14.

There is a boy’s wing and a girl’s wing, and they sleep 3 to a room. The theory there is to have a tattletale if any 2 kids get involved in something they’re not supposed to. A lot of the kids were sexually abused so they have all kinds of issues related to sex, masturbation, and molestation. Each room is equipped with cameras and an alarm that sounds if they move from their beds. I know it sounds very prisonish but the kids know it’s a safe place where they are protected from harm. They like the cameras and alarms, it’s more security then they’ve ever had.

The kids are never alone. They have an adult with them everywhere they go; they have privacy in the shower and restroom but only for a limited amount of time. Each and every moment of their day is structured, from the minute they get out of bed in the morning to the minute they go to bed at night. The treatment team acts as parents to the children, providing them with structure, care, love, hugs, and one on one time.

The hardest part of my job (besides hearing about the actual abuse) is recognizing the kid’s behaviors as just part of who they are right now. They aren’t misbehaving, they’re behaving. This is what they know, these are the behaviors that have kept them safe.

My night went something like this:
The kids were watching a movie when I got there. The new shift of TT (treatment team), 6 of us altogether, met to discuss the afternoon plans. Everything is done with a plan! After our meeting, we broke the kids into 3 groups and split up for afternoon activity. My co-worker Jay and I took a group of 5 boys outside to play Frisbee golf with paper airplanes. We stayed out for a couple hours, playing and having contests, and just goofing off. One of the kids, probably our most challenging, got very frustrated because his airplane wasn’t doing what he wanted it to do. When told to take space to calm down, he picked up a stick and threatened to hit Jay with it. Big fun. After a verbal attempt to get the boy to drop his weapon, Jay had to physically remove the stick from him and ‘help’ him take space. I was alone with 4 boys for a few minutes for the first time since I started there. A bit nerve wracking but I managed to hold down the fort!

Next, we headed in for some quiet time before dinner. Some of the kids read by the hearth, all cozy beside the fire. I snuggled on the sofa and read the Guinness Book of World Records with 2 little ones. They enjoyed getting grossed out by the pictures. Two members of the TT finished cooking dinner during this time. Dinner was nice, spaghetti and meatballs with a great salad and cheesy bread. We had a few behavior issues but nothing I wasn’t used to from eating lunch with the kids everyday.

Next up was what they call Routines. Each child is called individually by a staff and brought to his or her room to get PJs. Then they are brought to the bathroom to change and wash up and brush teeth. They are timed to be sure they brush correctly. Baths are also given on a rotating schedule at this time. The TT member gathers the soaps and towel and sends the child in to take a bath in a tub that is already filled with water. The kids have 10 minutes to bathe.

One of the kids (the one with the stick) got very silly at this time. He responds to stress (bedtime is stressful to him, bad things happened to this little boy at bedtime) by acting very inappropriately. By the time I got to him, he was crawling on the floor and making strange, very loud noises. I was instructed by the lead staff to take him out to run (so he could rid himself of some of this nervous energy) so at around 8:00 I was running up and down a large hill freezing my butt off! Once he calmed down, we kicked around the hacky sack for a while (he’s trying to teach me his moves) and then went back in for his Routine. I can’t say he was perfect after that, but he was certainly more relaxed and aware of himself. (This is a perfect example of the behavior point I tried to make earlier. I didn’t punish him for his negative behaviors; I gave him an opportunity to regain control of himself.)

Then it was time for Circle. The kids gathered together to talk about their day, and then we listened to a chapter of a Harry Potter book. The staff member even read with a perfect British accent, the effect was wonderful as he sat in the rocker beside the roaring fire. I felt like I was in someone’s comfortable home with their very large family.

Bedtime consisted of the kids being escorted into their rooms, hugged goodnight, and tucked into bed. Then we turned the alarms on and started cleaning up the kitchen and den. The TT was relaxed and had fun doing these chores. Then we gathered to debrief and write in the log book. Each staff picks 3 or 4 kids to write about so that everyone else who works with the kids knows what happened previously that day.

The evening was a wonderful experience. I can’t tell you how happy I am to be working with this population of children and the adults who love and care for them. I’m honored to be a part of this awesome program!